My Calling

I have always been impressed by people who have a concrete understanding of their “Calling”.  They know what the primary purpose of their life is.  

You see them on television. 

“So you are passionate about saving the gopher tortoise.”  “Yes.”  “Are they threatened with extinction?”  “Well, they are not on the Endangered Species List or the Threatened Species List at this time.  They are on the Deep Do Do List, however, and I have abandoned my full time job as Head of Product Development for Proctor and Gamble to create a better environment for these gentle creatures.  It’s my Calling.”  

“So you enjoy Barber Shop music.”  “No.  It is more than enjoyment. It is my Calling.  I am the Grand Harmonizer for the South East Chapter of the Society For the Preservation and Promotion of Barber Shop Singing in America (aka SFTPAPOBSSIA).  I heard the Buffalo Bills sing ‘Coney Island Baby’ and I was hooked.  I left my position as Sheet Music Manager at the Society For the Preservation and Promotion of Classical Accordion Music in the Western Hemisphere and never looked back.   

“I have been Called to fight for the eradication of really bad scotch.  No one should drink bad scotch.  Every waking hour of the rest of my life will be dedicated to improving the education of scotch drinkers.  To further the effort, I founded the not for profit organization Please Imbibe Superb Scotch Every Day or PISSED.  Our byline is ‘Life is short. Get PISSED.”

Nearly all beauty queens are “Called” to promote world peace. 

Merriam-Webster defines “Calling” as:

A strong inner impulse toward a particular course of action especially when accompanied by conviction of divine influence.

I have a few “strong inner impulses toward a particular course of action”.  Researching and consuming spectacular fried chicken, qualifies.  Assessing the long term effects of a 1.5 hour afternoon nap is a “strong inner impulse”.  Testing and documenting the quality of barbecue in Northeast Florida has long been a “particular course of action” for me.  In fact, most of my strong impulses are fairly self serving. 

I have had strong impulses for two courses of action that are in the realm of “Common Good”.  I have devoted significant effort to teaching others the fine art of barbecuing and the nuances of tailgating.  None of these impulses are “accompanied by conviction of divine influence”, however, unless The Kansas City Barbecue Society qualifies as some sort of deity. 

So I continue to plod along, waiting for the burning bush or the lightening strike on a sunny day.  I always hoped that St. Paul would reserve the seat next to me on a coast to coast airplane trip.  In the five and a quarter hour ride, he could tell me what God is “Calling” me to do.  But this has not happened.

It may be that the Divine Spirit is underwhelmed with my capabilities and so he is reluctant to “influence” me to any significant “course of action”. At this point, it really doesn’t have to be a very substantial course of action.  I might have trouble finding a cure for cancer but I could teach people how to effectively and safely load furniture into a U-Haul.  This is a great life skill for everyone. I practice it regularly, just ask my wife.  I have pretty good short order cooking skills.  I can show everyone how to flip “over easy” eggs without breaking the yokes.  I can teach the world how to make animal pancakes.

So I am waiting.  Since, statistically, I have less than five years remaining in my stay here on earth, I hope I get the “Calling” soon and I hope it is a simple one.