Month: June 2024

According to Wikipedia, in 1546, John Heywood coined the phrase “All’s Well That Ends Well”.  Supposedly, William Shakespeare was a fan of Heywood and that may have resulted in the Bard drafting a play entitled “All’s Well That Ends Well” in 1623. 

So, we have great documentation that, for at least 476 years, mankind can equivocate about the manner in which something is accomplished as long as the outcome is worthwhile.  Perhaps, John and Bill were only referring to overcoming failures along the way in achieving something very positive.  Something like Alexander Graham Bell and Mr. Watson.  Al spills some acid on his leg and calls out “Mr. Watson, come here I want you.”  A serious accident results in the first successful telephonic transmission of the human voice.  All’s well that ends well. 

Or it may have a darker meaning.  As long as you achieve the goal, the method does not matter.  For example, Rosie Ruiz taking the subway to shortcut and win the New York Marathon.  All’s well that ends well.  Okay, it only ended well for Rosie very briefly.  When the CCTV video was reviewed it got pretty unwell.    

My guess is that the concept of the end justifying the means is as old as the human race.  One of the earliest historical examples is construction of the pyramids.  The Pharaohs thought nothing of enslaving an entire nation for fifty or sixty years if the end result was a nice gravesite on the Nile. All’s well that ends well.

I don’t have a lot of experience with “All’s Well That Ends Well” but I do have extensive experience with “All’s Well That Ends”.  In the “… Ends Well.” version, it is a triumph if the end result works as well or better than planned.  In the “… Ends.” Version, it is a success if the project is finally over. 

I have had hundreds of “All’s Well That Ends” experiences in my life.  They may be brief, two to three day projects or huge, multi year, efforts. However, they all have the same characteristics. 

We start them with the loftiest goals. We are positive and excited to bang out a worthwhile project.   

“This morning I am going to hang the beautiful foil wallpaper my wife selected on one dining room wall.  The results will be stunning!”

When we get into the effort, we find it is a lot more complex and time consuming than we initially expected.  

“I’ve hung wallpaper before.  It’s only one wall.  Why is this taking so long?!  Yikes, it is really hard to get the air bubbles out of this foil.”

We lose zeal. 

“I’ve got ten hours into this endeavor and it really looks bad.  None of the internet techniques for removing air bubbles seem to work.  This looks like the work of a three year old.  I wished I had never jumped into this project.

We just try to make the whole assignment go away. 

“Okay, we let the bubbles sit overnight.  They didn’t get any better.  I’m going to have to take this paper down and repaint the wall.  Another mere 12 hours of effort and it will look like I never started this fiasco.

All’s well that ends.

I believe most of my major endeavors on both a personal and business basis fall into the “All’s well that ends” category. 

Another great four phase “All’s well that ends” effort is downsizing.  In 2019 my wife Susan and I moved from a ranch in the country to a small house near the beach.  We transitioned from a 5,500 square foot ranch house with an additional 7,000 square feet of storage in the barn and RV shed to a 2,300 square foot home.

The lofty goals were to give as much as possible to the kids and grand kids.  Sell a lot of stuff with the ranch (the tractor and 30 horsepower zero turn Kubota were not going to be very helpful on the zero lot home at the beach).  Give away as much as possible and send the remnants to the junk yard.

The reality phase was very different.  Amazingly, none of our progeny wanted their grandmother’s 1933 Singer Sewing machine in the solid mahogany case with matching chair or much of anything else.  So the “pass along to the kids” effort did not get rid of much.  Second, you can’t just send everything off without looking at it. 

For some reason, probably because we were push overs that had an unconscionable amount of storage space, Sue and I became the repositories of all the family treasures for both of our families.  At least a hundred boxes of things ranging from pure junk to precious heirlooms.  You can’t blindly toss this stuff.  So we opened and examined all 147 boxes.  We found my grandparent’s wedding rings.  First communion pictures.  Wrist watches, pocket watches, costume jewelry, valuable jewelry.  The process took forever.  Stuff was sorted by definitely save, definitely toss, and maybe/maybe not.  Some things would definitely be distributed to various relatives (eg. first communion pictures).  Others, such as 1940’s photos of our parents drinking beer at fourth of July celebrations and team pictures of the 1935 State Basketball champs could not be tossed. 

I concluded that, when you downsize, you will touch everything you own at least 3 times.         

About 20% into the evaluation process, I lost all of my zeal.  However, we had sold the farm.  The contract required occupancy by the buyer in four short weeks.  So Sue and I drove through sorting everything we owned and stored for our families sixteen hours a day. 

We needed to shift all the things we wanted to keep to the beach house but the beach house was already full of stuff.  So we had to downsize the beach house before we could move the residual downsized stuff from the ranch into the beach house.  The effort was beyond ridiculous. 

For example, I had three rather complete sets of tools.  A big set from the ranch, a nice set at the beach house, and a third set from the lake house we sold a few years ago.  I wisely moved the lake house tools into RV shed and never got around to sorting them out.  So I moved all of the tools into the beach house garage.  I loaded the fridge with diet Dr. Pepper.  I hooked up my Ipod with nine hours of rhythm and blues to a remote speaker in the corner of the garage.  Setting on a folding chair in the middle of the garage I sorted all the tools in keep or toss piles. Finally, I organized the keep pile for easy access.  This took an entire day.  I even blew through all nine hours Motown and Ray Charles.

Sue and I were both feeling very “All’s well that endsish” at this point.  Ultimately, we never really finished the project.  We delayed completion by stuffing unsorted treasures into two storage lockers.  Five years later we are down to one large storage locker but it is fair to say that the downsizing project is still in progress.

“All’s well that ends” but this one is not dead yet.

As noted, I have had hundreds of similar experiences.  Some very long.  Subsequent renovation of the beach house puts the downsizing project in short pants.  Some happen every year such as filing the Federal Tax Return.  Some short, like making barbecue for 50 people at a block party. 

All of them seem to have the same four components.

Makes we wonder if others have had the same experience.  I believe the reason that we don’t have Unicorns today is that Noah ran out of gas.  “Okay, I built the boat following the exact cubit measurements.  I captured two of all kinds of animals.  It’s really starting to rain.  I don’t have it in me to go hunting Unicorns.”

All’s well that ends.        

There are a few things in life that have very clear warning signs.  We should read the signs and avoid these activities.

For example, buying gold and silver from the people who advertise on TV.  I can’t watch five minutes of commercial TV without listening to a commodities guru tell me how incredibly lucrative buying gold and silver will be.  These have to be the dumbest people in the world.  They know that the returns on these commodities will be astronomical but they want to sell all of their gold and silver to me.  Why would anyone sell something that is going to triple in value next year?   Shouldn’t they be advertising that they want to buy all of my gold and silver?  This really puzzles me.  I’m not a commodity expert but I am skeptical that silver will return to its all time high and gold will be $3,000 an ounce later this year.

We should avoid robot calls or phone solicitations from anyone.  I never intentionally answer a robot call.  95 times out of 100, if I don’t have a number in my contact list, I let the call go to voice mail. Very few robot calls make it that far. However, occasionally one shows up with a Mt. Airy area code and exchange indicator. Aunt Flossie lives in Mt Airy.  She is not in great health.  Maybe her neighbor is calling me for some assistance.  So I answer and the debacle begins. 

“Mr. Sinelli, you may not know when you are going to die but you can be certain that you are going to die.  Like most Americans you probably have not prepared for this event and you are about to put all of your loved ones in a very bad spot.  Today, however, is your lucky day.  I can provide you with burial insurance that will lift this impending burden from the shoulders of your dear family members.”  I respond “Are you a licensed insurance agent?”  The caller says “Yes, I am licensed in the State of Florida.”  I say “Don’t you have this a little backward?  You know that I am going to die and you are going to bet $10,000 of Acme American Fiduciary Life and Casualty’s money that I am going to live.”  “Well, it’s insurance.”  “No, it’s a bet.  I bet $50 a month that I am going to die and you bet $10,000 that I won’t.  I think that is a little macabre. I also find betting on my mortality very depressing.   Not only are you making a bad bet for Acme, the stress you are creating for me may be accelerating my demise.  We should end this conversation right now.”  Click.   

“Mr. Sinelli, are you aware that your automobile warranty is about to expire?”  “No, I wasn’t aware of that potential catastrophe.  What car are we talking about?” Caller, “Your current vehicle.”  Me, “The 2015 F 150?”  Caller, “Yeah that’s it.”  Me, “I had no idea that I still had a maintenance policy on the truck.  I sold it two years ago when I moved to the beach.  Now, I don’t even own a car. Several years ago, in a conscious effort to save the planet, I bought a golf cart and that is what I use for all of my transportation needs. Rarely, I will engage public transportation but I never drive a private vehicle other than the golf cart. I keep pretty good records.  Let’s see, I sold the F 150 seven hundred and two days ago.  My five year maintenance warranty premium was $976 dollars, using the monthly proration refund formula authorized by the State of Florida Insurance Commissioner, you owe me $412.  When can I expect the check?”  Caller, “I’m not sure. By the way, would you like a warranty policy on that golf cart?”  Click.       

“Mr. Sinelli, you own a lot of real estate and we want to buy some of it.  Do you want to sell the lot in Putnam County?”  “No, I am anticipating another great depression and I plan on farming that lot.  Are you looking at the plat?  I am going to put the travel trailer in the northeast corner.  The chicken coup is going in the southeast corner.  With three acres I can support a large vegetable garden, three or four pigs and a milk/beef cow.  When the bottom falls out next year don’t stop by.  I will be defending the place, vigorously, against the short sighted people who never prepared for the crash.”  Click.    

My wife Susan offers this great insight.  We were driving the back roads in Georgia enroute to a client in Columbus.  We passed a single wide on a small lot with a sign in front that said “Fortune Teller”.   She said, “I don’t think I would take advice from that person. If they are adept at predicting the future, you would think that they would be living in a more upscale home.  I want to see that sign in front of the 1,000 acre ranch, with the 7,500 square foot house”.  Nothing wrong with living in a single wide but an expert oracle should be able to demonstrate a little more success.  If Elon Musk doesn’t elect to sell his Fortune Telling skills, I’m going to take my advice for the future from the lady who just picked nine straight winners at the horse track and drove there in her Maserati. 

Similar logic applies to the “Get Rich Quick Books”.  If you really know how to make $5 million in the real estate market using other peoples’ money, why would you tell others how to do it?  You could ring up $20 million a year.  Why invite a few thousand people to compete with you for $100,000 in royalties? 

So every day we see a lot of signs that warn us about something or give us sage advice.

I saw an interesting sign in the men’s room of my favorite Bistro.  It says “Employees must wash hands.  If no employees present, please wash your own hands.”

So I am taking my car to the repair shop when the “Check Engine” light comes on.  I am not going to feed the Bears.  I will be cautious about the bridge freezing before the road surface, even in July.  I am going to wash my hands.  I will wear a mask when it is required. I will turn off my cell phone.  I will not get in the express check out lane if I have more than eight items. I will beware of the dog, the snakes, the alligators, free range cattle, buffalo, mosquitos, low flying aircraft, wild hogs, and rabid raccoons.  I am not going to spit into the wind.

In essence, I am going to take my mother’s sage advice.  When the little voice says “Don’t do this!”  I am going to listen to the little voice.  

We just purchased a new automobile.  For our family, that is a notable event.  We tend to find a vehicle that we like and keep it for a long time.  Depending upon our changing transportation needs, we have owned a diverse array of vehicles.  We drove conversion vans when we toted our daughter’s forensic team around the country, one ton pick ups when we lived on a 30 acre ranch, sports cars just for fun, big SUVs and small SUVs.  After we sold the farm and moved back to the city we have a small SUV and a 2005 Mustang GT Convertible.  Who knows how long I will drive the Mustang.  18 years may seem like a long time for some people but I had a 1973 Cougar Convertible for 42 years.

Our 2011 small SUV died.  It owed us nothing.  We drove it for 190,000 miles and really enjoyed the automobile.  So we bought the new version of the same car.  We hope this will be a great car as well but something has changed dramatically in the last thirteen years.  Automobile technology.               

The additional technology that comes with the new model is staggering.  Ninety percent of the Owner’s Manual is directed to Smart Car features.  The manual is bigger than the most recent version of the Encyclopedia Britannica and much more poorly organized.  So I spent the first six hours of ownership pouring through the manual to determine which of the 3,473 technology features I intended to use. 

What peaked my interest?  Seat and mirror adjustments, climate control, auto bright light control, road contouring headlight tracking, red light time remaining sensor, back up camera settings, seat massage settings, altitude warning levels, fast food preferences, music choices, navigation preferences, driver assist options, parking assist, trailer back up assist, stuck in the snow assist, fog and dust storm assist, and 17 state toll lane access, to name a few. 

A spectacular feature that overrides all of the others is facial recognition capability.   A high tech digital camera recognizes the unique facial features of the person seated in the driver’s seat.  When it positively identifies the driver, it adjusts all of the Smart Car settings to the selections that unique driver has chosen in the Settings Menu. 

The car is equipped with a Siri like Avatar called Gracie.  I made 25 or 30 selections from the Smart Car Menu’s and asked Gracie to activate the facial recognition software.  Gracie responded that she was turning on facial recognition and from now on she would refer to this unique driver as “George”.  When facial recognition was complete, Gracie commented  “Why George, you are really quite attractive!  Do you smoke cigars?  Why don’t you let me select the ashtray setting instead of the coin holder option for that small compartment in the console?” 

So Gracie and I began careening through life as new found Smart Car operators.  Every day, after facial recognition, Gracie would warmly welcome me to the auto.  “Good morning George!  How about a fast trip to McDonald’s for a large black coffee?”  After a few weeks, I was making my way to Atlanta.  Gracie interrupts a classic rhythm and blues tune, (Ray Charles singing Old Man River) on the Sirius Classic Soul station, with the following suggestion.  “George, I have noticed that you keep your hands at 10 O’Clock and 2 O’Clock on the steering wheel.  Clearly, you were paying attention in that 1963 Driver’s Ed class.   Why don’t you move them to 11 and 1 and we can get there an hour earlier?”

Gremlins started to creep in to the Smart Car driving experience. I found a parallel parking space in front of a Merchant that I wanted to visit.  I pulled just past the open space and asked “Gracie, will you please park the car?” 

“Oh George, I don’t like this parking space.  It’s a little tight for me and the license plate of the car in front of you shows that it is owned by an Ohio State fan. I’ll find a better spot.”  She drives around for fifteen minutes and finds a nice angle parking space two miles from our original space.  “George, isn’t this better?”  I reply “Yes but it’s going to take me a while to get back with the four Pizzas I ordered.  We are running late and the four mile round trip on foot isn’t going to help keep them warm.”  “Well if you’re not happy with this one, I have another just a half mile farther out.  Besides, your current health biometrics and recent weight gain indicate that you really should walk at least that far if you plan on eating Pizza.”

A few months later, the facial recognition software started acting strangely.  I closed the door and Gracie said, “Well, welcome back Mary Lou Retton!  Are we headed to the Olympic training facility in Colorado Springs?  Navigation shows it to be 1,857 miles. Turn left at the second traffic light.”  The Smart Car then activated all of Mary Lou’s settings.  After removing the steering wheel from my spleen I was able to, manually, reset the seat adjustment in a few short minutes.  My limp only lasted a few days.  In addition to Mary Lou, I have been welcomed to the vehicle as Rasputin. The navigation system automatically routed me to the nearest ABC Liquor store and recommended several nice Russian Vodkas available at that location.  Surprisingly, the Mad Monk is a huge Sinatra fan.  His two top Sirius choices were the Sinatra channel and the Forties Junction.  The most interesting misidentification occurred when face recognition positively identified me as the fifth ranked international terrorist on the FBI’s most wanted list.  The algorithms automatically send a silent alarm to the Feds.  Surprising how quickly they can react in these circumstances.  Thirty five minutes later I was having very interesting discussions with eleven of the finest law enforcement professionals in the country.  I was amazed at how they could land Black Hawk helicopters in front of me and behind me on a narrow two lane road.     

I was listening to the Jazz station one day and the Dave Brubeck Quartet started playing “Take Five”.  A little bit of heaven.  Gracie interrupted with an interesting fact.  “George, did you know that Dave Brubeck has a full head of hair but his piano is a Baldwin?”  “You don’t say?”  I was tempted to fire up a cigar and try out the ashtray setting of the coin holder.

Eventually, I started turning off more and more Smart Car features.  The problem was that it was taking me longer and longer to get where I wanted to go.  I would end up at the Raw Bar instead of Walmart.  For a few weeks, Gracie was under the impression that I wanted navigation to take me through the scenic routes.  My 33 minute drive to Orange Park Florida routed me through the Blue Ridge Parkway in North Carolina.  I know how to parallel park and back up a trailer.  I drove a Semi for three years in college.  I could certainly gauge which parking spots were accessible and which were not.  In addition, I was still having the sporadic miscues of facial recognition.  Surprisingly, Gracie never mistook me for George Clooney.

Gracie was not happy when I cut back on the selected features.  I got a letter from Geico saying that they had revoked my preferred driver status.  My small SUV had informed them that I regularly drive nine miles over the speed limit and don’t use many of the Driver Assist tools.  Gracie ratted me out and it was going to cost several hundred dollars each year in increased insurance premiums.

So I gravitated back to the 2005 Mustang.  Now there is a piece of equipment.  If you want to start the car, you have to insert a key and turn it.  You adjust the seat and mirrors.  You want to know the outside temperature?  Too bad.  This is a car not a weather station.  If you are cold, you select one of two vent settings and manually turn the hot and cold throttle to the comfort range you want.  If it is dark, you need to turn the lights on.  It doesn’t have an “auto” setting that turns them on when it is dark.  You have less than five comfort choices and you control each of them.  It can be done totally accurately in less than twenty seconds.  No voice control issues.  No “Gracie, set the heat to 73 degrees.”  “Okay George, I am getting directions to Sweet Peas.”  If you don’t know where you are going that’s your problem.  The Mustang will get you there quickly, with Panache, but the directions are your responsibility.  You want to go fast?  Hit the gas pedal and it will go as fast as you would ever care to go.  You get to control the music.  The car is equipped a high end sound system that includes a six disc cd player.  I may be the last person in Florida who has a thousand cd’s.  But I can listen to exactly what I want for more than five straight hours.    

The Mustang and I have a great relationship.  It is a car and I am a driver.  I’m not a slave to Ford’s technology.  I am not sitting in a portable social media pod.  I am driving from Point A to Point B and the Mustang will make sure I enjoy the trip.

There is a lot of talk about doing away with fossil fuel.  I hope that this does not occur any time soon.  I want to continue driving my 2005 Mustang GT Convertible every day until one of us has to quit.

My wife and I have spent the last two years on a six week renovation project.  We are nearly finished, in fact it appears that we only have eight weeks left. 

My wise and experienced friends told me that it would take twice as long and cost twice as much as the original estimate.  I am a heavily experienced project manager and a CPA.  So I believed that I could do much better than the twice for both timing and cost.  The projects I have experience managing are giant application software system implementations.  Projects that cost tens of millions of dollars and run for a year and a half.  Certainly, very different than house renovations but ventures that definitely require adroit project management. 

Cost wise, the home renovation project has performed fairly well.  Timing has been abysmal.      

We are really committed to finalizing renovation of this home because we plan on staying here until we become blithering idiots.  So we engaged a General Contractor to complete the project. Much of the work would be completed by his staff.  However, he augmented his team with a hand full of specialists (plumbers, HVAC professionals, tile people, painters, etc.).  

It did not take long to determine that the primary reason for the timing over run was delayed performance by the lead contractor and all of the subs. In the robust Florida economy, everyone seemed to be over committed.  All of the delivery dates started to slide.  A year into our six week project it was clear that timely delivery was not on any contractor’s radar screen. 

I tried the carrot.  “Hey do you guys and ladies like barbecue?  Next Wednesday, finish up the new siding and I’ll smoke a pork shoulder and some ribs.”  They arrived at my house at 4:15, put up two sheets of Hardy Board and spent three hours eating barbecue.

I appealed to the heart strings.  “You know having the demolition half done for five weeks is wreaking havoc with my asthma.  Can we get through this phase, soon?”  The Contractor says, “I know what you mean about the dust.  If I didn’t take three days a week to get off shore on my fishing boat, I couldn’t breathe.  A few more weeks and the demo will be history.”

I tried the stick.  “Oscar, I have been talking to my lawyer about the delivery delays.  He thinks there is a major problem with a six week project pushing two years without completion.”  The Contractor replies: “I know what he means, what a pain!  I’ve got twelve projects in the same boat.  That’s why I never put “time is of the essence” in any of my legal documents.”                  

So with eight weeks left on our six week project, I decided to get a Contractor’s license and finish the job.

What do I know about residential construction?  Nothing.  But I’m not going to do any of the work.  The subcontractors will.  All I have to do is find the right men and women to do different elements of the project.

You have to pass a test to qualify for a Contractor’s license for the state of Florida so I enrolled in a school for Contractors to prepare for the exam.

Here are some of the highlights of the Curriculum for General Contractors:

Choosing the Ideal Client

The optimal residential construction client is both wealthy and gullible.  It is challenging to find a non thinking individual who is well healed but the search is well worth it.  As the project unfolds, it will be very helpful to have someone who will believe the myriad of thin excuses you may have for non performance or delays. 

“No we can’t complete the wall because I can’t get the required Schlagger toggle bolts.  They are all produced in China and none are being shipped to the US because of the trade war initiated by our government. My supplier thinks that this will change in a few weeks and I really don’t want to take a chance on the less desirable alternative from Brazil.  Thanks to this political upheaval, the price for these beauties is going up.  Can you cut me a check for another $500?”    

Creating a Decades Long Backlog of Business

The reasons for creating a massive backlog are fairly obvious. 

First, the financial benefits are overwhelming.  Your policy upon signing an agreement must be to collect half of the fees up front.  Ostensibly, this is to pay for materials.  Since we have selected the optimal client described above, there should be no problem getting these funds.   So upon signing, you receive half the revenue and more than all of the profits for your entire project and you haven’t spent a dollar.  This is better than Charles Ponzi’s postage stamp gambit.  A solid business practice for any successful Contractor is to continually have a five year backlog of projects under contract.

Second, the accelerated cash flow will allow you to proactively acquire a lot of needed equipment and other assets.  These substantial deposits may be used to purchase miter saws, cordless drills, a second home in the mountains, a motor home (which can be creatively written off as a mobile office for tax purposes) or a first class boat.  Since you live in Florida, you should consider extensive investment in your personal residence.  In a few years, when the bubble bursts, your home cannot be taken in a bankruptcy action.  Ideally, you should plan on having a fully paid for residence with a value of at least $5 million.       

Third, locking in a large backlog of work will help ensure that you can keep your staff and sub-contractors busy for years.    

It should be very clear that none of the contracts you sign have any provisions that are time sensitive.  You may verbally explain that we should finish this up in three weeks but you will maximize the time value of money and compound interest by stretching the project out for a year.  Explain to your client that so many of the variables are outside of the Contractor’s control that you can never commit to an absolute delivery date for anything.  This is the key to raking in the proceeds of the five year backlog and avoiding annoying lawsuits for untimely performance.

Scheduling Your Work

Perhaps the most critical responsibility for a Contractor is scheduling the activities of your staff and subcontractors.  None of your clients know that you have promised eleven customers service tomorrow and that you only have three assistants. 

Adroit communication with your customers is very important.  Always tell them in advance the day when you will be arriving at their home.  However, be vague in defining the time that your staff will arrive.  Never use an actual time, such as “We will be there at 8:30.”  You can say we will be there in the morning or even first thing in the morning.  At ten o’clock call the customer and tell them that there was a problem at home depot and your guys should be there soon.  At three, send one of your workers over with sand paper and a caulk gun.  Have him or her patch up some nail holes and leave for a critical problem with another job.  The assistant can hit four or five different customers with the same process in one afternoon.  You will have fulfilled your promise to be there Monday.  Over time your customers will be trained to expect this kind of performance from you.      

Monday evening, text all eleven customers to tell them you will be there first thing in the morning or right after lunch.  On Tuesday, run through the same cycle.  

Eventually, you will have to be productive for all eleven clients.  By staying in constant communication, you can see where you need to prioritize resources as the level of dissatisfaction with untimely performance grows or wanes with each customer.  

Excuses

When there is a problem with timing, cost, or outcomes there is a need for a really solid explanation of what has gone awry.  “The dog ate my project plan” isn’t going to cut it.       

The best excuses are logically solid and very difficult to verify or refute.  It also helps to be creative and incorporate current events that might impact a construction project.  If you have researched and selected the ideal client, you will find that they may actually believe the tripe they are being fed by the mainstream media.  Having a problem related to this news is perfectly logical and believable to these people.  For example, this was a great excuse for 2021.

“Two of my carpenters were vaccinated for Covid last week.  They really had adverse reactions.  We hope that it is just a side effect of the body creating antibodies but we are concerned that there are flaws in the vaccine that may change their DNA and impact their ability to wield a hammer for many months.  We certainly don’t want to send anyone to your house who may compromise you or your family.  I’m trying to bridge the gap but it will be tough sledding for a while.”

Perfect.  This will change the client’s expectations of delivery for many months with no negative impact on you or your company.    

After attending classes, I feel qualified to replace all the Contractors on the great 21^st century renovation project.  So I call my General Contractor and tell him that his services are no longer needed.  Please create a final bill.  To pay the final invoice, I will judiciously follow the performance standards he established for the project.  He can expect my payment in thirty one short months. 

I don’t know how long it will take to complete the renovation. I do know that I can do it a lot faster than my previous General Contractor.  I have the advantage of actually wanting to finish the project.

I am astounded at how poorly I ran my consulting practice for 40 years.  We never collected fees “up front”.  Services were only billed after we provided the service.  We didn’t over sell engagements.  We only signed contracts for business that we could address with competent staff.  We hit almost every timeline and almost every budget for 40 years.  We stayed busy even during economic downturns and never filed bankruptcy to avoid refunding prepaid fees.  

What were we thinking??!!